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fuck cancer and the all the other diseases that take away loved ones

today a friend wrote me on facebook that one of our friends from art school had been in surgery and there was nothing they could do. she never told me she had cancer, and now she is on palliative care.

personally, i think it’s my selfishness that makes dealing with death so difficult. i don’t want people to leave me, or leave the planet. it’s hard to let go of someone. the irony is that i have no control over it, i have nothing to do with it.

and selfishness aside, people are going to die. that’s the only thing in life that is absolutely certain. and death is never going to be pretty. add to that all those pesky regrets…

we just don’t think death comes when it should. as we mature, we think it will be those who are older will go first. what a silly assumption to make, even for a child. people die when they die. no one knows when it will happen, and it’s final. one second a person is alive, the next they are gone for fucking ever. and there are no do-overs. 

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